It so familiar

This rabbit hole of nostalgia

Consuming.

The person you have been

Or should we say

The people…

Because you have been so many people.

And you have had so many friends over the years

Come and go

Stay

Disappear

and you’ve left people behind.

You are constantly attempting to measure your ordinariness

You fear it

Creep around corners as if awaiting it’s approach

The inevitability of it

You fear that somehow it could sneak up on you

You

One of the most extraordinary people you have ever met

You test fate

Gobble up the most ordinary job you could find 

And force yourself to go there

Almost every day

Waiting to see

If this will be the monster that finally defeats you

But in your heart you know it won’t

Because your heart sings of so many things

And it’s most heartbreaking song

So far

Is the one you are telling yourself now

that somehow you have sealed your fate

somehow you have made a bed

and must lay down in it

swallow the bitterness that you might have been

something more.

it is heartbreaking

because…

you know

Better than anyone

How temporary it is